Why is it so difficult to achieve new year resolutions and how are we overcoming these
barriers to our personal growth and success?
Many have written on this topic including myself. The goal of this this articles to
investigate the above questions and briefly reflect on the lessons that we gain from the
year 2020 to prepare ourselves to some degree for the new year, but not only prepare
ourselves but to a greater extent better ourselves to become what we are not yet.
There are various factors that contribute to not achieving or achieving our new year
resolution. For myself when I do introspection, I noted that a big barrier is my belief
system. On a conscious level I want to achieve my goals but subconsciously I have
fallacies about myself that I am not worthy of success and happiness. That good things
happens to others not me alone. In other words, the inferiority complex, thinking of your
lesser than what you think of others. This is a universal phenomenon but it is more
visibly noted in colored and black South Africans and the historical disadvantaged cross
the world, in South Africa this because of the manner the apartheid system condition the
mentioned to think of themselves and the youth of today were fostered by parents that
were thought to view themselves as inferior in comparison to other ethnic groups.
Secondly, we want change to happen immediately. We want to achieve something that
will take months of preparation within a matter of weeks. For an example let’s take that
you want to lose weight. This will note happen within the next few weeks, because there
are fundamental behavior changes and shift in thinking that must take place before this
is achieved. It will require an exercise program, a change in diet and in some case to
learn from someone that has achieved what you want. This will help you get a model
that has worked and by using their model for losing weight it will increase your chances
of getting the desired results. What is most important is to note that life is a marathon
and we should not treat the achievement of our new year resolutions as a sprint
because it will require consistent effort over time to see them realized.
At times we feel pressure to set goals or resolutions for the new year be it personal and
professional. It is this pressure that makes us abandon our resolutions before February
of the new year. We need to evaluate how achieving these goals or resolutions will
affect those dear to our hearts this includes family and friends. When achieving your
goal will it improve the livelihood of those you love? Answering this question will sustain
you to go after your resolutions when things get difficult. You will endure the endless
hours of work that needs to be done because you are motivated to give it all. This is
because you are not doing it for yourself but to impact those you love positively. When
we love those close to us this becomes the drivers of our detentions it is difficult to
abandon your resolutions when you are doing it for those you love.
A pastor once said that is not what you do in church that matters because all of us are
behaving at our best, but it is what we do after church that determines our faith and
beliefs. The same can be said about setting resolutions we can have the best of
intentions but if there is no action that is accompanied with the best of intentions it is a
hopeless case. Action is the single factor that will give you the possibility to achieve
your resolutions. But we procrastinate and fear to fail because we suffer for the
inferiority complex. The notion that failing is bad was taught to us by the schooling
system. It is this notion that we need to abolish if we want to act and remain committed
to our resolutions. I am a firm believer that doing something whether you fail or not is an
achievement on its own.
Get someone to keep you accountable because it easy to stop when you feel alone.
When you are on the journey to achieve your objectives, it is important to have a person
that will remind you why you are doing what you are doing. They will give you the
necessary support when you feel like giving up. As a recovering drug addict, I have
seen the importance of have someone to keep you accountable because there were
events in my life that made me question the wisdom of my decision to live a sober
lifestyle. It is at such moments when the value of an accountability partner is seen, in
your darkest hour when you feel that it is not worthy it. Your accountability partner will
hold you to your resolution.
The year 2020 have shown us that change can happen at any time. And during a crisis
of the pandemic that we were reminded that although we set goals that we need to
adjust them with the current change of events. As random things may seem there can
always be a plan to rearrange your resolutions with the challenges and obstacles that
you will encounter during the new year.
In conclusion:
Let us remind ourselves that is possible. If you forget everything I wrote and just
remember the words that it is possible and remind yourself each morning that your
resolutions are possible to be achieved. I will be satisfied that a change in your beliefs
system is taking place and you will become what you are not yet.
By Remigio Angelo Dingashe
